Uncle Stevie Cohen Comes Through on Francisco Lindor Like We Knew He Would

You thought Steve Cohen, the richest man in baseball was going to let another team scoop up a once-in-a-generation talent over a little thing like 16 million dollars? Steve Cohen once spent $155 million dollars on a hideous statue. The man literally made the amount of money he spent on the Mets BACK last year. Uncle Stevie is inevitable.

Not only is this the largest contract in New York Mets history by about a zillion dollars but it’s the largest contract in New York Baseball history. This is the moment Mets fans. We’re richer than the Yankees. Those poors The Steinbrenner’s couldn’t IMAGINE paying one baseball player $341 million dollars. No more Wilpons. No more Adrian Gonzalez. No more cheapskates, Ponzi schemes, or batting out of order. This is THE COHEN ERA.

Wooo boy. I’ll tell you. This Opening Day hits different. A real major league lineup. A real major league bullpen. A real owner. Acquired the best position player that switched teams this offseason and Stevie Cohen spent the amount of money he makes in 11 seconds to pay that talent. There’s OPTIMISM. You know the last time I felt optimism as a Mets fan? The moment Todd Pratt abandoned second base and body slammed Robin Ventura into the dirt in about 2000. Part of that optimism is that I was 10, and I didn’t have the reference point that the Mets were a futile franchise for most of the time in the years preceding my birth. Now, Steve Cohen doesn’t sound like a joke anymore does he? Now he sounds like a THREAT.

Did you know that only two players since 2015 have a higher fWAR (whatever dork thing that is) than Francisco Lindor? Mookie Betts and Mike Trout. Ever heard of those guys?

With his blue hair, blue glove, and New York Mets Coming to America jacket, Lindor has embraced Mets life. He’s a perennial MVP candidate and Gold Glove and Silver Slugger recipient. A New York Met until he’s in his late 30’s. Lindor. Alonso. Potentially Conforto and Syndergaard signing this season too. A dynasty in the making.

Great Opening Day is postponed already because of COVID reasons. See you all tomorrow for deGrom win day.