(***Listen to the song on repeat while you read***)
The other day I was working from home, trying to prepare for a conference call and I look outside my dining room window and I see a gaggle of predators perched upon my neighbors house. It appeared that these vicious and giant creatures were some type of vulture, I am no zoologist, so don’t take my word for it but these birds were something that I have never seen before. A few of them spread their wings and made this insane sound that reminded me of the velociraptor from Jurassic Park. After I heard this sound, it got me thinking, now I want to preface this with saying that I might be experiencing cabin fever and this quarantine might be weighing heavy on me, regardless, the birds got me thinking.
What if dinosaurs were still alive, somewhere in the world, maybe we haven’t discovered them yet or maybe we haven’t believed some of the people who have unmistakably identified creatures that could only be dinosaurs? Woah, this got the wheels spinning so I started to do a deep dive into the internet to try and find some form of dino life currently on earth.
Have you ever heard of a cryptozoologist? Nope, me neither, a cryptozoologist is a pseudoscience and subculture that aims to prove the existence of certain entities, including dinosaurs living in the world today. This cryptozoology was founded in the 1950’s by zoologist’s Bernard Heuvelmans and Ivan T. Sanderson. A study done in January of 2020 stated that local tribes in equatorial Africa have seen “large, frightening creatures living in the depths of the jungle”. Researchers questioned the tribes and asked the witnesses to describe what they have continually seen, it was unequivocally, the description of dinosaurs. These tribes have no contact with the outside world, pop culture, television, media, nothing, they were shown pictures of certain dinosaurs and that is what was confirmed to the researchers. This has to make you wonder, what if certain factions of dinosaurs in Africa survived the extinction 66 million years ago and because they were not disturbed by the tribes there, they have lived in the outer most part of these African jungles.
In the Republic of Congo, there have been sightings of Mbielu-Mbielu-Mbielu, it is a herbivore that lives in the water. Some paleontologists have said that if this species does exist it would be a cross between a crocodile and a stegosaurus. Researchers believe that Mbielu has adapted to aquatic conditions in order to survive in the Congo.
The next dinosaur sighting that has been seen in the jungles has been something far more dangerous and vicious than the Mbielu, this is beast is known as Nguma Monene. It resembles the Spinosaurus is Spielberg’s Jurassic Park III. This animal could live in the water and hunt its prey from land or water, making him the ultimate super predator, it’s size and speed is unmatched and the locals have described it as being thirty feet long, and said there is no comparison to either crocs or snakes.
This next dinosaur has been spotted in Central Africa in recent years, it can live on land but primarily spends time in the water, waits for elephants to come drink and then pounces and kills the elephants. It was described as looking like a rhino but far more threatening. The locals know that this is not a rhino and the stories of this creature have been around for generations.
The final species of dinosaur that is continually reported by the locals of the savannah region of Cameroon, it lives only on land and goes by the name of Ngoubou. Fossil evidence of this creature has been discovered in Australia and Asia, so we could assume that at some point they populated Africa and have been able to survive in small numbers to this day.
Look I get you are thinking that the quarantine has made me completely lose my mind, but perhaps it hasn’t, perhaps this is true. Although our technology and research has progress so vastly, there are still certain places in our world that have not been studied or explored. There are still certain regions of Africa that have not been explored to great lengths, especially the jungles where these animals have been seen. The jungles are so legendary and unexplored that few non-locals have the ability or the guts to explore these areas. The areas are loaded with political chaos, wars and has made the area extremely unsafe to visit or to explore.
The question becomes, how do I get there to explore these areas? Obviously I would dress exactly like Indiana Jones the entire time, I refuse to pay my one way but if someone sponsors me to go, ProcrastiNation sports will go and film my journey to locate the dinosaurs. Obviously I will need to assemble a team of 5-6 people, I would choose Sam Neil and Jeff Goldblum, Sylvester Stallone, Hulk Hogan, Angelina Jolie and Mahershala Ali. That’s my squad, and then our ProcrastiNation camera crew and a couple of my buddies, so if you want to sponsor this trip you are looking at airfare, supplies, clothing and equipment for about 14 people, my guarantee is that we will find the dinosaurs. Life, uh, finds a way.
Nothing would bring me more joy to know that we had some dinosaurs still alive out there somewhere, a boy can dream. Let me know your thoughts, time to have a Jurassic Park marathon tonight.