Style, pizazz, sex appeal, jack hammer. Andy Reid, hubba hubba. The Kansas City Chiefs Head Coach arrived in Miami looking like an absolute snack, wearing his signature Hawaiian shirt. He attended the opening night’s media day in a more formal Hawaiian shirt, I couldn’t respect this move more if I tried. I am known to be a Hawaiian shirt guy at any point during the year and in any location. Winter, Spring, Summer or Fall just break out your Hawaiian button down and feel like a King.
Now the point of contention in my household is that my beautiful bride despises my Hawaiian shirts. That has not stopped me from wearing them with pride. They are comfortable, breathable and come in all different colors and styles. They are versatile and can be dressed up or dressed down for any occasion. Need to go to a fancy dinner? Tuck the Hawaiian in and throw a coat on over it. Want to hang out by the pool? Hawaiian shirt and a bathing suit, perfect. They look great with jeans, shorts, bathing suit and pair them with sandals, shoes, sneakers. SO MANY OPTIONS!
Look, I can be honest with myself, I have become the definition of “skinny-fat”. I can give off the appearance that I am not fat but with my shirt off, I am a dough ball, just not an ounce of muscle on me. Side note, I had a rare muscle disease as a kid, so maybe that’s it, can’t make jokes about a kid who almost died. The Hawaiian shirt is the perfect compliment to us skinny fatters or the huskier boys out there. My wife doesn’t get that, I try and tell her that comfortability of my Hawaiian’s is unmatched. When the love handles and the budding man boobs start to come into play, you need to start coming up with style choices that will help you out. I searched and searched but Hawaiian shirts are the key to happiness in the style department. They make me feel like I can accomplish anything when I button them up and head out to Home Depot, Target or the grocery store. My wife knows that I mean business when I tell her I am taking her out to an Outback Steakhouse and I grab the Hawaiian off of the hanger in the closet and toss it on the bed to let it spread out before I choose on the matching pants and shoes that will surely only add to the ambiance of being elbows deep in a Bloomy Onion or a loaded baked potato.
Andy Reid is an ambassador for this cause, putting these shirts in the mainstream and sending a message to the San Francisco 49ers that this game is already over. If you’re the 49ers do you even show up? Not only did Reid wear the Hawaiian but the entire Chiefs team paid homage to their Head Coach and arrived in Miami in a variety of Hawaiian shirts. I don’t think I have ever seen a more attractive looking bunch of fellas in my time. You don’t get in between a hungry man in a Hawaiian shirt and a steak and you certainly don’t get in the way of a man in a Hawaiian shirt and a Lombardi trophy. Unfortunately for the 49ers, Andy Reid is looking to hunt down both the steak and the Lombardi.